Couples counselling in Vancouver - a deeper look

Couples counselling in Vancouver
Emotion-focused couples counselling
infidelity

Couples Counselling Can Help With:

When relationships feel stuck or distant, couples counselling creates a safe space to understand what's really happening beneath the surface. Whether you're struggling with recurring conflict, emotional distance, or simply wanting to reconnect, therapy offers a place to explore and come together.

Couples Counselling can help address:

Recurring conflict patterns and arguments
Emotional distance or disconnection
Communication breakdowns
Trust issues and recovery from infidelity
Life transitions and major decisions
Loss of intimacy or affection
Feeling unsupported or misunderstood
Wanting to deepen your emotional bond

An Emotion-Focused Approach:

Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy is a structured, evidence-based approach to couples counselling that helps partners reconnect by addressing underlying emotional needs and improving their emotional responses to one another.

EFT is grounded in attachment theory, which views romantic relationships as a secure emotional bond between partners. The therapy addresses the negative patterns and emotional disconnection that develop when this bond is threatened.

Key beliefs:

Emotions drive behaviour in relationships
Emotional accessibility and responsiveness are essential for bonding
Unmet attachment needs fuel conflict cycles

Unlike other approaches that focus on communication skills or behavioural change, EFCT prioritizes emotional connection. It recognizes that partners often hurt each other when they feel unsafe or unseen. EFCT is ideal for couples:

Couples facing disconnection, infidelity recovery, or loss of intimacy
Partners struggling with repeated conflict patterns
Relationships where deeper emotional understanding is lacking
Couples wanting to strengthen their attachment bond

Frequently Asked Questions About Couples Counselling

What is couples counselling, and how is it different from individual therapy?

Couples counselling focuses on the relationship itself rather than on one person's concerns alone. Both partners attend sessions, and the work centres on the patterns, emotional responses, and needs that play out between them. Individual therapy focuses on one person's thoughts, feelings, and history. Some couples benefit from both, and I am happy to discuss what would suit your situation.

What is Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFCT) for couples?

Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFCT) is an evidence-based approach to couples counselling developed from attachment theory. It helps partners identify the negative cycles in their relationship, understand the emotional needs beneath those cycles, and build a more secure, responsive bond. EFCT has a substantial research base and is one of the most widely studied approaches to couples therapy.

Do both partners need to be committed to counselling?

Many couples come to counselling with different levels of hope or doubt, and that is common. What helps most is a willingness to show up, be honest, and explore what is happening. If one partner is hesitant, we can talk about that openly in session.

How long does couples counselling take?

There is no fixed timeline. Some couples seek shorter-term support for a specific issue, while others work together over a longer period to address deeper patterns. We check in regularly on progress and adjust our approach based on your goals. With that said, EFCT-focused couples counselling typically recommends about 12-20 sessions.

Can couples counselling help if we are considering separation?

Yes. Couples sometimes come to counselling when they are unsure whether to stay together. Counselling can offer a space to clarify what each partner wants, explore whether the relationship can be repaired, and, if separation is the right path, approach it with more clarity and less damage.

Can you help couples recover from infidelity?

Yes. Recovering from infidelity is one of the areas EFCT addresses directly. The work typically involves creating enough safety for the hurt partner to share their experience, helping the partner who was unfaithful to respond with empathy and accountability, and rebuilding trust over time. Recovery is a process, and there is no single timeline for it.

Do you offer online couples counselling in B.C.?

Yes. I offer secure online couples counselling throughout British Columbia, in addition to in-person sessions in Vancouver. Online sessions allow partners to connect from home and can be especially helpful for couples with busy schedules or those living in different parts of the province.

What happens in the first session?

The first step is a free 15-30 minute consultation, where we can talk about what brings you to counselling and whether I am a good fit for your needs. If we decide to proceed, the first session focuses on understanding what each of you is experiencing, what you have already tried, and what you hope to change. You control what you share, and we move at a pace that feels safe for both of you.

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